Sometimes they're so cute I could just bite them

Chloe: Mommy, are these jeans?
Me: No, they're cords.
Chloe: But they don't have any plugs.

*****************************************************************************

Luke: Mommy, can I go outside?
Me: Are you going out in your bare feet?
Luke: I have boy feet! I not a bear!

Quick! I need help!

I'm going to enter Audrey in a Beautiful Baby contest.

Don't hate. The prize is $125,000 for college.

I worked on these two pictures today. Which would you choose, or should I take some more? I have to enter by tomorrow evening.

***edited to add a closer up version of the first picture.





Thanks, ya'll.

Wordless Wednesday- One Year Old

WW- On a clear day

We're done with Halloween

And no, I don't mean for the year.

I mean period.

It's hard enough corralling two kids and a baby in a stroller without my husband to help, but add in tons of sugar? Insanity.

We went trick-or-treating with several other families. About six houses into it, a teenage boy in a very spooky mask leaned down into Chloe and Luke's faces and growled and boo'd at them.

I mean, it seriously would have been enough to make even me scream.

It scared them so much that they both ran crying back to me at the end of the driveway! Luke was ok after several minutes, but Chloe just kept getting more and more scared.

She refused to go to any more doors and was huddled by my side.

Huddled.

And any time anyone in a remotely scary costume came near, she started whimpering and hiding behing the stroller. After a few minutes of this, she was in a ball crying and begging to go home. She was so scared that she couldn't even get up to walk back to the car.

Luke, of course, then had a tantrum that we were stopping early and had to go home, and I had to chase him down the street.

Good times.

After all that drama I then had a horde of teenagers with absolutely no costumes come to my door to get candy, and steal the "good stuff" from the one child with them who was young enough to actually be trick-or-treating.

The whole night frustrated me so much (actually is still frustrating me, since Chloe is still asking me several times a day Why, Mommy? WHY would that big boy want to scare me? Why? WHY?) that we are just done. Next year we're going to Chuck E Cheese.

They'll still get to dress up, though. Because the excess sugar and the nightmares I can do without.

But this?

I wouldn't miss for anything.

The birds and the bees and the lions and the crocodiles and the camels...

Today on the way to Michaels:

Chloe: Mom can we buy some pumpkins and Halloween decorations at Michaels?
Me: No, I think we're going to wait and just decorate for Christmas.
Chloe: Did God make pumpkins?
Me: (still feeling like a confident, knowledgeable mom) Yep! God made everything.
Luke: Did God make animals?
Me: Yes.
Luke: Did God make lions?
Chloe: How did God make people?
Me: Yes, He hade lions. And He made Adam out of dirt and He made Eve from Adam's rib.
Luke: Did God make Nile crocodiles?
Chloe: Did God make me?
Me: (getting just a little frazzled at this point by the questions all being asked at the same time while I am trapped in the car on the way to Michales) Yes, God made you and crocodiles.
Chloe: How did God make me?
Luke: Did God make camels?
Me: Yes He made camels and He made you as a baby in my tummy.
Luke: Did God make giraffes?
Chloe: How did He make me in your tummy?
Me: (getting a little frantic for a distraction at this point) Yes He made giraffes, and He took a little part of daddy and a little part of mommy and they grew into a baby in my tummy.
Luke: Did God make elephants?
Chloe: But HOW did I get in your tummy?
Me: (desperately) What kind of pumpkin should we get at Michaels?

An hour later, back in the car...

Luke: Did God make birds?
Chloe: When can we make our wreath? Where are we going to put our pumpkin? Are we going to put a face on our pumpkin? Can I help you make the wreath?
Luke: Did God make pumas?

At least one of them got distracted...

WW- Into Everything

It might not happen after all...

We had a day full of errands and are almost ready to go tomorrow. The clothes are set aside but not packed, new movies were bought, but I still need to set up the portable dvd in the car.

And then, just before bed...

The stinkiest, leakiest, loudest diaper ever.

On Audrey.

Just to clarify.

And half an hour later?

Another one.

And it just has that smell...that icky, I've got a stomach bug smell.

But she doesn't have a fever, so we'll see what the night brings!

WW- Get on the bus

Note to self- part three

Next time the kids have a razzberry contest in the backseat of the van?

Make sure they've finished their chocolate ice cream first.

Uh-oh, what did they do?

Words to strike fear in the heart of any homeowner:


Mommy, we've been painting the walls black!


Thank God they were just pretending.


And that they were using feather dusters for paint brushes.


I don't think my walls have been so clean since I had to vacuum them!

Today

So my break is over and here is some of the excitement of our day today...

(baby crying)
ME: Luke, did you hurt Audrey?
LUKE: Yeah.
ME: Was it on purpose or by accident?
LUKE: By my elephant.

If that doesn't scream "on purpose" I don't know what does!

*****

We went to the bookstore after dinner, where Chloe and Luke were scared silly by a girl in a Curious George costume, but Audrey was utterly entranced.

Would you believe I walked right past their cafe with nary a snack or coffee cup in my hands?

Really.

We went out the door carrying our books (you didn't think we'd escape without purchasing anything, now did you?) and noticed some smoke coming from the trash can.

Suddenly Luke yelled, "FIRE!"

And there was. The trash can was on fire.

And everyone sitting at the little cafe tables outside looked over and commented on it.

They ooh'ed and aah'ed and laughed.

And sat there.

Apparently it is more work to take your coffee cup back inside to alert the staff to their impending crispyness, than it is to do the same with three children, because I was the only one to go back inside and tell anyone about the blaze.

Good thing I resisted the pull of the coffee and snacks, eh?

WW- Dreaming of Winter

Tackle It Tuesday- Chloe's Room

Something had to change. Luke has been terrible at bedtime since Isaac left. He's up for about 2 hours every night after bedtime yelling and screaming for different things- drinks of water, using the toilet (which he refuses to do during the day), needing a different blanket or pillow...the list goes on.

So Audrey has been sleeping in my room since she couldn't share with him, and I wake up at every little noise she makes.

I was exhausted and frustrated with my kids. So I decided to move Audrey's crib into Chloe's room and totally rearrange the furniture there. By myself.

Halfway through, I thought, "What in the world was I thinking?"



I took a break for a few days, but finally sucked it up and finished moving things, and here is how it turned out-

So now Audrey and Chloe are sharing a room, and Luke is still up 12 times a night, but at least I'm getting a little more sleep!

To see more tackles, visit 5 Mintues For Mom

They can't fool me!

You know you have watched too many episodes of Alias when you wake up to the sound of your child yelling and screaming that he's ready to wake up, and you tell yourself that it is really just the evil plot of your nemesis to drive you crazy with sleep deprivation and you block it out and pull the covers over your head.

And you really believe it for a while.

Day 3

Yesterday was about the same as day 2. Luke never initiated going potty, but went when I prompted him. Today I was thinking about just putting him back into diapers and asked if he wanted to put on a pull up instead of his underwear.

His answer?

"No way!"

So I guess the potty training continues for at least a few more days!

Day 1

So I have a break from the, er, bowels of potty training, so to speak.

At the end of the first day, Luke now goes potty every time I take him, so I know he has some control. He also recognizes when he's wet, which he didn't in the beginning. But he doesn't know when he needs to go, and just pees on the floor and then yells, "Oh no! Mommy! The potty came out!"

I was hoping that by the end of the day he'd be able to tell me when he needs to go, ven if he doesn't quite make it on time. That is where we were with Chloe (and she was almost a year younger!)

But we made progress, and it wasn't too bad. Hopefully it will be mostly done tomorrow, though!

Spider!!!

Today I came running when I heard Luke yell from the other room, "Spider!!! Mommy, spider!"

I won't even tell you how many times this happened and I looked for the elusive spider.

I thought it must have been a fly he was seeing, because there was no way a spider was getting around the house that quickly, and I refused to entertain the idea that several different spiders had taken up residence in the house.

And then I realized...

Luke was wearing his new bug underwear.

There was a spider on them.

So later when I heard him yell, "Mommy! I got crabs!" I knew he didn't really. It was his new underwear.

I'm quick like that, see?

It's Potty Time!

Today we are potty training Luke.

We've done the potty dance. We do a "go underwear!" cheer.

I even had to do a "gas" dance when he had gas while sitting on the toilet.

And no, don't even ask, I'm not demonstrating any of the dances for you. But I will tell you that it involves much waving of the hands and grooving in circles.

We have had two accidents, one big and one small, but he does go quickly every time he sits on the toilet. No forcing him to sit there for 10 minutes or anything.

Thankfully a friend picked up Chloe to play at her house, because Audrey decided to teeth her first two teeth today! I thought about putting off the potty training, but Luke has been asking to sit on the toilet (and actually going on it) on and off since February, and we had everything ready to go and we had already talked about learning today, so I'm hoping that she'll get over the fussies quickly.

Ok, it's time to head back to the toilet. I'll come back and update you later.

Can you stand the suspense of it?

Well that didn't last long!

Today I had someone (a friend's sister) come and clean for me. I've just been overwhelmed and my house was in serious need.

She scrubbed my kitchen and both bathrooms for me, and they were cleaner than they had been in months.

Notice the word "were."

Chloe wanted to eat a biscuit leftover from dinner last night so she sat down at the table.

And then dropped the biscuit on the floor.

It bounced.

And rolled.

And crumbled.

The floor that was clean? Is clean no more.